Welcome to another week of the only reason to not completely give up on major wrestling promotions. With multiple stars injured, this episode feels strange to watch. All we can say is next week is the biggest test for Triple-H so far. In the face of these, our computer is down, so we’re typing this on Corgin’s computer. He really needs to have a better password. Enough of the talk. On to the show.
A recap of United States Champion “burying” Sami Zayn. Somehow, we think most expected him to unify it with the NXT Championship.
Solomon Crowe, with hair that looks like he handed the barber a picture of Havok, coming out to face Baron Corbin. If you ever wanted the internet to not like Corbin, this almost does it. Crowe getting whooped leads to chants “of “Boring” & Crowe”. Crowe briefly mounts offense before being finished off. Rhyno then comes out to ”Rhyno’s gonna kill you” and “Gore”. A brief brawl before Rhyno gores everything in sight. This match was more enjoyable than Jenna vs. Sharmell, but not by much.
Finn Balor asked if he’d rather face Zayn or Kevin Owens. A bit strange to hear that question. Balor makes it clear he does not care who he faces.
Back from commercial, Tyler Breeze is asked the same question, similar answer before giving his sour candy smirk.
NXT Women’s Champion Sasha Banks faces an unnamed wrestler. Sasha says Becky got lucky last week, and that she’ll see who’s the boss next week. Oh-Eh, Eh-Oh. Zebra shirt gets offense in early on before Sasha uses some mounted punches to regain the advantage. Becky mocks Becky’s hand gestures before locking in the bank statement to win. Another squash, but the match serves it’s purpose.
Devin Taylor interviews Bayley & Charlotte. The two women discuss things like Dana Brooke’s jealousy and Emma’s theft of shirts. They challenge the two of them to a match next week. After they talk about beating them next week , they woo. We like Charlotte’s woo, but don’t tell Bram.
Uhaa Nation’s video package details his intention to make history. Though he’s still like Scott Hall early in his WCW run regarding his name.
Carmella vs. Alexa Bliss is next. A fun match that, while not as great as matches from the other women in the division, certainly showed what they can do. Blake and Murphy come out to watch the match. Strange not to have dubstep and strobes going off. Bliss takes advantage to battle back before Carmella locks in a submission hold. Blake and Murphy cause a distraction that causes her to break the hold. Allowing another rally that ends in a splash win for Bliss. Blake and Murphy then mock Enzo and Big Cass. The way Carmella sounds when she says Enzo and Big Cass will win is something we need to ask Justin about.
Hideo Itami is asked who he wants to face. He chose Owens. Knowing how injury will sideline him certainly makes it painful that we won’t get this match for a while.
Devin now interviewing Emma and Dana. Emma accepts the challenge laid out earlier, Dana resists the urge to rub herself. She still makes time to pat Devin on the head. Really strange gimmick for her.
Adam Rose and Breeze vs. Balor and Itami. After watching E60, all we can say is Ray Leppan deserves a lot of respect. If his current NXT run is long-term, we think he’ll get that respect. Enough of that, let’s focus on the action. Rose and Itami start this match off. There is tension played early on between Balor and Itami while Rose does pretty well unintentionally giving a reason to feature him as a possible replacement for Itami. Breeze rolls up Balor to win. Breeze that lays out all three men.
Another recap of Cena vs. Zayn shows the latter’s injury. This leads into a video after the match has Zayn discuss how he won’t let his injury stop him against Owens. He also talks about the response from his hometown fans.
Now we get Zayn speaking to Owens. Zayn starts with an edited in comment about the injury that gets two Tweets of then night. From @ReBourneAgain: Wow that wasn't obvious dubbing of Zayn's voice at all and from @wheelerdeeler: That Dubbed bit is honestly the highlight of the night Zayn asks what the real reason for the hatred is. First asking if it was because Zayn became a Triple-H guy bfore striking the nerve by asking about Owen Owens wearing Zayn merchandise. Somewhere, Bret Hart is likely saying he feels KO’s pain. Owens leaves the ring, but he turns around and says that he will hurt Zayn again. Guess this means he’ll make him read our financials.
We see a Takeover ad. Basically, Elimination Chamber is told it’s doomed.