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Thursday, February 16, 2017

Impact-Review 2/16/2017

Thoughts out to the loved ones of Chavo Guerrero Sr. And Nicole Bass.
Fight to be the best, or the Raw Deal awaits.
Before TNA World Tag Team Champions The Hardys defend, we see 2 recaps. One see Eddie Edwards betrayed. After this, The Decay battle Moose and Brandi Rhodes. The match begins with TNA Knockout Champion Rosemary distracts Moose, but it doesn’t help until they get Moose outside. This brings Crazzy Steve dominating with holds & chops, but Moose brings himself back up until Abyss begins to distract him. Despite this, Moose sends Steve outside, and tags in Brandi, who dominates Rosemary off the top. She brings Moose back in, who gets the pin over Steve.
Edwards does not stop to say barely anything, but Davey Richards is his target.
Moose tells Brandi she’s being Mini-Moose. A) That name is familiar. B) He may want to get with her.
Edwards says that what happened was his biggest low-point. Angelina Love says Davey is not fighting, and asks where Eddie was when Davey was injured. She then introduces Davey. The two former partners argue & Davey says he will destroy the name they built before they brawl. When it’s over, Edwards demands a street fight to be held tonight.
Last night, Braxton Sutter was at the bachelor party held by Mike Bennett. The guys there look about what you’d expect of us.
The Hardys are in the arena out in Mexico. Boy, the referee will go underground.
Next week Sutter marries Laurel Van Ness. But Allie’s stuff last night doesn’t appease many.
Eddie Kingston wrestles Jesse Godderz. Jesse is dominated early on with strikes, but Jesse brings his surprising speed to battle out. It doesn’t last long, as he is suplexed, and is sent into the middle-rope. Jesse takes advantage of a miss to break out, using the blockbuster to try to pin. When Kingston goes outside, he is grabbed, but hangs Jesse on the rope, and hits an STO to try a pin of his own. Jesse battles out and tries an Adonis Lock. After a few more moves, Jesse gets the pin, but has to run after the arena blacks out.
Sutter doesn’t want what’s implied to be drugs, and wants to leave, but Bennett refuses to let him leave. One of Bennett’s buddies climbs a ladder, brings himself on the possible drug guy. Well, it’s not the 1st time we had guys wrestle wasted.
Tyrus will host Fact of Life this week. Guessing Greg Gutfeld won’t join him.
Allie’s party pisses them off. Should’ve had drinking.
Tyrus introduces Eli Drake, who despite having an arm in a sling, demands Tyrus get off the table. Drake  becoming like The Rock with his mockery of Tyrus’ weight, and ends up with Tyrus hand on his throat. Both will wrestle next week.
The Hardys meet Konnan, who’s happy to know they’re used to not wanting money.
Laurel gets some freaky looking present. It’s from us.
The Hardys battle Psicosis and Super-Crazy to be Tag Team Champions in Mexico too. Basically, it’s in clips as Vanguard 1 interacts with some femininas. Fun action as we see the win of The Hardy’s. Now, they’ve teleported to their home. Next week sees them battle in Mid-Atlantic action.
Brooke wants Sienna next. She may be drunk with us though after what we think will happen.
Brooke vs. Sienna starts with the speed of Brooke and the power of Sienna keeping it even-handed, with each one exchanging moves like a game. Once Sienna uses Brooke’s arm to apply a sleeper-like attack. Sienna then uses her tape to resume the choke, then stomps away. Brooke still kicks out as we get the indication Sienna possibly becoming her own entity will happen. Brooke rolls out of the way, leading to Sienna having to stop before plowing into Maria. As Brooke gets out of the AK-47, she uses the roll-up to win. Seems like it was on RAW.
Sutter wants to leave while it’s Bennett’s friend bringing an altered DVD of Bad Teacher, then Bennett’s idea of the stripper is the bust. Didn’t think there would end up a time where that DVD would work nicely. Still better than the recent party we went to.
Don West is selling more great stuff. Or stuff is being sold by great Don.
Drake promises to beat Tyrus next week as he intrudes on the cameraman’s personal space.
TNA World Heavyweight Champion Bobby Lashley is out here. As Lashley takes being TNA Champion with arrogance, he says he loves fighting, battling, & hurting people. This brings out Josh Barnett, who everyone suspects will soon be TNA Champion. We’re not joking. Barnett doubts Lashley’s drive to be TNA Champion. Lashley warns him not to do this as he shakes hands. Lashley says in MMA, there are going to be rules to protect Barnett, but Barnett tries to lock the arm of Lashley. This results in both deciding to wrestle.
Sutter leaves after everyone’s plastered, but not before placing Bennett’s phone next to him after sending out a phone-call on it. Even the happily married & faithful need to put a passcode on.
Edwards is here for the bout. This leads to Angelina speaking to distract, leading to Davey attacking from behind. Davey tries to throw Edwards into the rail, but he’s reversed & chopped. Edwards goes to again, but Davey gets out of the way. Davey attacks the arm that was sent into the ring-post going intobreak. Back from break, Davey hit’s Eddie’s hand with the chair. Davey then stomps on Eddie in the corner. Davey’s stopping to taunt brings the opening to Eddie, who sends Davey outside & flies at him. Edwards throws him back inside and brings the chair back in, but this brings the chair of Angelina to again distract. Now Davey strikes. Davey goes again, but Elisha Edwards makes the save, but is beaten up as Angelina handcuffs her to the bottom rope. As Angelina goes to use the weapon, Edwards throws himself over his wife as a shield. Davey then grabs it and slugs away. Angelina puts the second weapon on Edwards, which Davey uses to con-chair-to. Then she low-blows referee Earl Hebner. The match is officially a no-contest, though Angelina begins to count as a symbol.
Next week’s match with the Hardys is advertised. A bit much after that. Oh well.
Not a bad week, though it is again slower than Nick Patrick’s 3-count.

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