Impact Bell to Bell Review 7/1/2015

Well this past Sunday was Slammiversary. Given the attention to tonight, you might have had little interest in ordering it. It actually wasn’t a bad show. There were a few problems, but at least we had a blaze of glory.

A video for TNA World Heavyweight Champion Kurt Angle vs. Ethan Carter III starts the show. This match is what fans wanted Sunday.

The Rising vs. The Beat Down Clan in a losers must disband match. Drew Galloway and MVP start by brawling with each other. MVP asks for a time out before tagging in Low Ki. After quick momentum shifts, Drew tags in Micah. Josh Mathews lets you know that Haku is Micah’s dad. Which is why we have Lagana tell him bad news. When Kenny King tags in, he dominates for a bit before tagging in MVP. Josh says MVP may start a new group if he loses. That’s been our booking philosophy. The team up enables Low Ki to eliminate Micah of all people. We are locking our door. MVP and Low Ki are able to use the team up on Drew, with Eli Drake asking to tag in. A desperation attack allows Drew to tag in Drake. Drake is a house of fire before hurting his ankle. Drew looks concerned about the status of his partner. Too fishy. We suspect Russo’s back. Drew starts against the Lucha Underground star Hernandez. Hernandez starts with shoulder tackles and by chopping. King and Low Ki try to assault, but a miscommunication sends Low Ki outta here, and pins King. Despite being eliminated, Low Ki tries to attack, but gets a shoulder load of steel. Drew tries attacking Hernandez, but a kick by MVP allows for a border toss. MVP then tags in to finish off Drew with a drive by kick. The poor man’s Bullet Club wins.

A Samoa Joe bundle? What’s NeXT.

MVP says he has a present for the BDC. Pay.

Magnus starts talking as if Sunday’s match was not a last minute alteration to the match. He welcomes back Mickie James, who thanks the fans, and Magnus, for warning her, not rubbing the truth in her face, and winning the match. 2/3 ain’t bad. Boy did this angle die at the scene of the accident. Former TNA Heavyweight Champion, Tag Team Champion, and employee James Storm then walks out and says Mickie should thank her for not crippling her. He should thank Billy for getting him a shot at the Gooker. After Storm says he can get any woman he wants, Mickie promptly calls his bluff and demands Storm find a woman. May we suggest Abyss as yet another Park family member.

EC3 training with Tyrus. We aren’t sure if he’s winning.

The Wolves vs. The Dirty Heels in a 30- minute ironman match to decide the TNA World Tag Team Champions. The Wolves take advantage early on, but as soon as Austin Aries tags in, he shirst momentum the Hee’s way. With no clock, we will not be sure if we botch the time. Tweet of the night comes from @ShroomMeister: Honestly, the least the unpaid production staff can do is put a clock and score on screen.

The momentum rolls the Wolves’ way once they are able to team up on Bobby Roode. Though when Aries is back in, he starts to talk too much. Davey Richards tries for a submission, but Aries is able to roll out and tag in Roode. Once Eddie Edwards tags in, Aries is able to take over, and team up with Roode. Aries uses a bow and arrow-style hold before Eddie breaks the hold. The Heels are dominating before we finally get the time on TV. Eddie is able to do a hurricanana on both men and tag in Davey. Davey puts the team in the driver’s seat, and even puts Roode in the tree of woe. Aries is able to prevent a pin. The Pope accidentally says The Wolves are former WHCs. Well they were somewhere else. Partial points. Aries takes over against Davey. Aries goes for a pin, but only gets two. Davey sells a powerbomb by laying in the legs up position for a few seconds. Davey eventually battles back, and goes to tag in Eddie. Davey has to kick Roode away before he can do this. But once Eddie is in, he uses a backpack stunner, but only gets two. Eddie chops away before Aries starts a double team. Davey is able to get Aries out quickly,This is short-lived, as the Heel are able to use a double team to shift things their way. When Aries tags in, Aries lock in last chancery. Davey has to fight through Roode in order to break the hold. Once the Wolves get Roode out of the ring, they go for a double team before Aries breaks it up. It’s not long before Aries gets the first fall. Threee minutes remain while Roode holds the Wolves for a suicide dive. Josh forgets we don’t have nameplates on outr belts. In fact, the only WWE belts that have them are held by John Cena and his “friend”. Eddie is able to tie it at one with under a minute. Both Eddie and Aries are down when Roode tags in. Eddie rolls him up to go 2-1. Roode rallies to lock in a crossface, but it’s too late. The Wolves reign once more. The Pope call them Patriotic Wolves. Good dodge.

An ad for a One Night Only means Slammiversary may now be our penultimate PPV.

TNA Knockout Champion Taryn Terrell vs. Awesome Kong vs. Brooke in a triple threat match is next. We may get answers to that “Playtime is over” stuff no one talks about. Not sure what is stranger: The fact that Billy got Courtney Love paid, or Taryn’s entrance. Kong starts by brutalizing anyone that gets within reach, but Brooke beats Taryn severely early on. Taryn rolling out leaves Brooke and Kong to face off. Kong is able to use power to overcome before Taryn tags in. Josh reminds us that Taryn beat Havok. Might not want to say that name near the other commentator. Taryn is able to beat on Brooke like they’re in a hotel room. Kong then heads out and attacks the Dollhouse, but she doesn’t do a good enough job, as they prevent them from knocking Brooke off the turnbuckle. Taryn pins Kong with an assist. As she heads to the back, the lights go out. We then see those videos were for Gail Kim, who seems to go into hiding to heal a broken finger. Despite this only being a video, Taryn screams like Gail slaughtered everyone in her hometown.

Jeff Jarrett and Mike Tenay talk about the angle Dixie’s hoping keeps her employed here. Jarrett says there is a future with the two promotions, which means he will pull out of the sale when Bob Carter adds more stipulations.

Angle vs. EC3 is the main event. This is the most anticipated possible WHC change not f---ed up by Hulk Hogan so he’s not outshined. We see an ad by Yeti coolers. It’s pronounced “Yet-Tay”. Angle starts by locking up with EC3, followed by another chinlock Randy by EC3. During this feeling out, fans are hot for both men. EC3 briefly takes over before he goes to Suplex City, and is sent outside the ring. Angle then belly to belly suplexes EC3 on the outside before bringing him in, and suplexing him some more. EC3 is able to kick out, and belly to back suplexes Angle before Stinger splashes him. The Pope acts like Sting is retired. Silly bastard, he only wishes he retired. Josh refers to a DDT as DDP. Boy they are earning their pay. EC3 then uses a full Nelson, to which Angle gets out of and brings EC3 down. Angle then delivers more Germans than a Munich traincar. Angle uses a missed splash to Angle slam EC3 and ankle lock him. Tyrus breaks it up, and EC3 attempts a 1%er. Angle Germans some more before sending Tyrus down and Angle slamming EC3 again. Angle lock in the ankle lock, but EC3 rolls out. Angle belly to belly’s EC3 into referee Brian Hebner. Tyrus uses this to his advantage. He hits the 1%er, but only gets two. Tyrus then attempts to enter with a chair, but is ejected with the help of Brian Stifler and Earl Hebner. EC3 attempts another 1%er, but Angle rolls through and ankle locks one more time. EC3 needs to bite on his wristband. After trying to reach the rope, he rolls out and breaks the hold. EC3 is able to roll out of an Angle slam, and get the pin.

So ends Bell to Bell. It didn’t have as many great matches, the tag team and WHC matches both delivered, and at least showed glimpses of the show fans once watched in droves. Well, kind of anyway. Until next week.