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Thursday, April 20, 2017

Impact Review 4/20/2017

Thinking of Rosey.

Being today is RVD Day, let's enjoy our last review in the next while.

Tonight, both men in the main event are waiting. But we begin with Impact World Tag Team Champions LAX defending. LAX dominate two wrestlers that are not signed here. Not much to say, it ends fast, then brings LAX with a promo. Konnan gets the fans going here before The Decay enter for the brawl.

Karen Jarrett is out here to be like if Steph tried "acting" face. Then brings news we're now having to share our office with GFW. Then she talks about the matches tonight. Then our attempt to appeal to  through Sonjay Dutt. He wants the X-Division match to main event & have him put in. Andrew Everett emerges to say he's gone too far to let more wrestlers in the match. To finish brilliance in our United overbooking here, Impact X-Division Champion Trevor Lee & Gregory Shane Helms also say no to his appeal. Wait, now Bruce says it will now be six wrestlers.

Krimson's back to be part of the VOW group. If we knew he was in the Army, we wouldn't have made fun of him so much.

Another KO One Night Only. That match won't happen again. Believe us.

Impack Knockout Champion Rosemary vs. ODB starts with a brawl before heading outside, where the veteren ODB has things until the clothesline by Rosemary is followed up with suplexes before her missing the dropkick leads to ODB using her power, and slamming Rosemary's face into the buckle. Though a mistake by her leads to Rosemary hitting the red wedding to end the match.

Swoggle got in despite us hiring Haku to scare him away.

Don sells in the Ziggler way.

Suicide will be in the X-Division match as Sienna wants to face a GFW wrestler.

We see Braxton Sutter & Allie's issues with Sienna & Laurel Van Ness. This leads to Kongo Kong mutilating someone.

James Storm is discussing that he's waited for a while to wrestle Impact World Heavyweight Champion Bobby Lashley.

Alberto El Patron thinks of both Storl and Lashley to be great opponents. This sees GFW World Heavyweight Champion Magnus demanding a shot before him.

Lashley vs. Storm is now. Josh is here with Lashley. We knew he wasn't going. As the match starts, the attention is not on the two guys busting their damn asses in there. Lashley dominates early before Ethan Carter III enters. We suspect there's a swerve on the was as Storm and Lashley take brawling to the outside going to break. Back from the break, Don respects AJ Styles, and The Pope tests his headset. Lashley throws Storm around as the audio guy tries to prevent you from having to hear one announcer. Storm begins coming back with clotheslines & a neckbreaker. He hands Lashley everything including a lungblower before going for the Last-Call, but has to improvise because of the power of Lashley. After hitting the dominator, Lashley goes for a pin, Stork kicks out as we see Lashley EC3. Lashley goes for a steel-chair, but nearly has it backfire. But the referee bump has Storm get a pin that no one is there for. Storm goes to use the bottle, but EC3 enters & uses it on Storm. Because of this, Lashley hits the spear to get the pin.

Dutch says Dezmond Xavier is in the X-Division match.

After video of Impact Grand Champion Moose being attacked by Chris Adonis, Moose wants to wrestle him, but Davey Richards will. Eddie Edwards may be there.

We see the end of Lashley vs. Storm, then hear Trevor Lee & Everett talk before the bout. It is revealed the sixth wrestler is not Sean Waltman, but it is Low Ki, who leads the early mayhem. Including everyone trying a dropkick as we see Low Ki wrestles in his suit. Has to be taxing. The brawl even heads outside one wrestler at a time going into break. Back from break, Lee drives Everett to the matt with both of Lee's knees. This has Lee sending others that want in, back out before we see Dutt's leflt eye is swollen. Oh, and Josh is not leaving. Wrestling has a s---ton of bait-and-switch. Suicide attacks Lee obly for a moment until he is sent outside. Everett Pele's Lee until we get everyone hitting a move for 3 minutes. Everett Frankendriver's to both Xavier & Lee, but Low Ki gets the pin. After the bout, Borash punches Josh.

The angles are not likely to impress, but the wrestling may.

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