We are back with the only WWE show worth watching. Soon, we may get to say that about a TNA show. In any case, we will detail some of the more action packed moments that make NXT the reason many fans are close to almost absolving Triple-H of his responsibility for every RAW main event from 2002-2005. Though the PPVs will require more. Without any further interruption, we review the show.
Our show begins with the reigning, defending, undisputed NXT Champion Kevin Owens ready to kill again. Owens was not happy Sami Zayn stopped him from destroying Alex Riley. We thought Owens was a heel. In any case, instead of Zayn, we get the Commissioner of the World Wrestling Federation William Regal. Regal says it’s not a platform for agendas. This is not cable news. Out comes Zayn looking to fight. Regal allows for an NXT Championship main event for May’s Takeover, which instantly makes it better than Payback. Owens refuses to put the Championship on the line against someone back for a week. Zayn pulls the “Shawn’s Better” card by saying Owens is in Zayn’s shadow, which causes Owens to agree to put it on the line. While this show is not a show about long promos, this actually sets the stage for a big Championship match.
Cut to the back where we learn NXT will run shows out of Philadelphia. Justin’s a lucky bastard. The segment continues to show Carmella refusing Blake and Murphy’s advances. This causes Alexa Bliss to get in Carmella’s face. Carmella slaps Bliss, who is then comforted by the Dubstep Duo like a Brazzers meme.
Back from commercial, and Riley wants one more match. *Christian Joke*
Enzo Amore wearing a great deal of leopard The feed cut from Big Cass starting to speak, to his “S-A-W-F-T” line. Some luck this week. Blake and Murphy’s music makes many Payday fans look around for Bulldozers and Cloakers. Exciting action for a quick match. Like many men, courting a lady is the undoing. As Cass is able to hit the decisive boot to the face to allow Enzo to get the win.
A profile of Becky Lynch has her talking about busting her ass and paying her dues to get here.. All she had to do was make a video. Remember, hold the phone sideways. We then get Bayley refusing to speak to Devin Taylor about her upcoming match with Dana Brooke. Smart woman. Emma then randomly comes in and puts a hair band on Taylor. Not sure what she’s smoking
Miz really should’ve belted out This is my rifle, this is my gun. This is for fighting, this is for fun.
A Baron Corbin promo shows he’s bummed The Aces and Eights ended.
Next is Bayley, the woman who thinks Lazy Town deserves a Daytime Emmy vs. Dana Brooke, the wrestler with a Spearmint Rhino gimmick. Bayley working in kayfabe a step behind. Dana isn’t a bad wrestler, just pushed way too far way too early. She must be a workout buddy of Triple-H. Emma comes down with Bayley’s shirt and music. Emma stole Bayley's gimmick. This is enough for Dana to get the win, and caress herself like she’s in a 1990’s 3:00 A.M. movie on Cinemax.
Back from commercial, and we see Regal decided on a quiet signing for the Championship match. He’s seen enough of these signings derailed no doubt.
Hideo Itami vs. Adam Rose. Rose looks like he yearns for the days when Leo Kruger stalked the South African terrain. Rose dominates the early going. He looks like he may skin Itami during this match. Eventually, Itami starts to rally to get the win with a dropkick. While there were “Hideo” & “GTS” chants, we really wish the crowd got behind Rose.
Bayley is not happy Emma stole her stuff. She really wants it back.
Becky facing a woman we did not get the name of. We’ll call her Red Top. Not too much going on. This is a tune up for her match with Sasha Banks. Tweet of the night goes to @ReBourneAgain: This Sarah is dressed like a lot of women I've seen around Seattle on weekends. Becky gets a submission win. Decent match that showcases the #1 contender.
Rhyno says he and Corbin like to hurt people. If wrestling doesn’t work out, they can always book here.
Chris Jericho talks to Stephanie McMahon in the WWE approved reading of questions to her tomorrow.
Zayn vs. Riley with Owens on commentary makes us think Riley will get added to the Championship match. You know what would be funny? If Riley wins the Championship to “Work the marks”. We still can’t get over former CZW Champion Drake Younger as someone keeping the peace. Seeing Zayn wrestle again is a true joy. Riley surprisingly doing pretty well himself. Match ends in a DQ when Owens attacks Zayn and powerbombs Riley on the apron. The fans chant “One more time” & “Thank you Kevin”. Not sure what that says about the man he callously assaulted.
This week provided a bit more action than last week. The advancement of the feuds between Owens and Zayn, Bayley and Emma, Becky’s tweening to a face are a welcome relief from how similar feuds are attempted on the main show. Well this ends the night for us. We will be back to try to make sense of the stuff we taped before we had Billy Corgan tasked us with tackling real life issues or Jeff Hardy saying “Wanna see something cool”. See you guys around.