Pages

Follow Blue Bar Cage!

Thursday, April 20, 2017

Impact Review 4/20/2017

Thinking of Rosey.

Being today is RVD Day, let's enjoy our last review in the next while.

Tonight, both men in the main event are waiting. But we begin with Impact World Tag Team Champions LAX defending. LAX dominate two wrestlers that are not signed here. Not much to say, it ends fast, then brings LAX with a promo. Konnan gets the fans going here before The Decay enter for the brawl.

Karen Jarrett is out here to be like if Steph tried "acting" face. Then brings news we're now having to share our office with GFW. Then she talks about the matches tonight. Then our attempt to appeal to  through Sonjay Dutt. He wants the X-Division match to main event & have him put in. Andrew Everett emerges to say he's gone too far to let more wrestlers in the match. To finish brilliance in our United overbooking here, Impact X-Division Champion Trevor Lee & Gregory Shane Helms also say no to his appeal. Wait, now Bruce says it will now be six wrestlers.

Krimson's back to be part of the VOW group. If we knew he was in the Army, we wouldn't have made fun of him so much.

Another KO One Night Only. That match won't happen again. Believe us.

Impack Knockout Champion Rosemary vs. ODB starts with a brawl before heading outside, where the veteren ODB has things until the clothesline by Rosemary is followed up with suplexes before her missing the dropkick leads to ODB using her power, and slamming Rosemary's face into the buckle. Though a mistake by her leads to Rosemary hitting the red wedding to end the match.

Swoggle got in despite us hiring Haku to scare him away.

Don sells in the Ziggler way.

Suicide will be in the X-Division match as Sienna wants to face a GFW wrestler.

We see Braxton Sutter & Allie's issues with Sienna & Laurel Van Ness. This leads to Kongo Kong mutilating someone.

James Storm is discussing that he's waited for a while to wrestle Impact World Heavyweight Champion Bobby Lashley.

Alberto El Patron thinks of both Storl and Lashley to be great opponents. This sees GFW World Heavyweight Champion Magnus demanding a shot before him.

Lashley vs. Storm is now. Josh is here with Lashley. We knew he wasn't going. As the match starts, the attention is not on the two guys busting their damn asses in there. Lashley dominates early before Ethan Carter III enters. We suspect there's a swerve on the was as Storm and Lashley take brawling to the outside going to break. Back from the break, Don respects AJ Styles, and The Pope tests his headset. Lashley throws Storm around as the audio guy tries to prevent you from having to hear one announcer. Storm begins coming back with clotheslines & a neckbreaker. He hands Lashley everything including a lungblower before going for the Last-Call, but has to improvise because of the power of Lashley. After hitting the dominator, Lashley goes for a pin, Stork kicks out as we see Lashley EC3. Lashley goes for a steel-chair, but nearly has it backfire. But the referee bump has Storm get a pin that no one is there for. Storm goes to use the bottle, but EC3 enters & uses it on Storm. Because of this, Lashley hits the spear to get the pin.

Dutch says Dezmond Xavier is in the X-Division match.

After video of Impact Grand Champion Moose being attacked by Chris Adonis, Moose wants to wrestle him, but Davey Richards will. Eddie Edwards may be there.

We see the end of Lashley vs. Storm, then hear Trevor Lee & Everett talk before the bout. It is revealed the sixth wrestler is not Sean Waltman, but it is Low Ki, who leads the early mayhem. Including everyone trying a dropkick as we see Low Ki wrestles in his suit. Has to be taxing. The brawl even heads outside one wrestler at a time going into break. Back from break, Lee drives Everett to the matt with both of Lee's knees. This has Lee sending others that want in, back out before we see Dutt's leflt eye is swollen. Oh, and Josh is not leaving. Wrestling has a s---ton of bait-and-switch. Suicide attacks Lee obly for a moment until he is sent outside. Everett Pele's Lee until we get everyone hitting a move for 3 minutes. Everett Frankendriver's to both Xavier & Lee, but Low Ki gets the pin. After the bout, Borash punches Josh.

The angles are not likely to impress, but the wrestling may.

Thursday, April 13, 2017

Impact-4/13/2017

We see last week's events. Hated having to make everyone watch alone.

Reno Scum battle Laredo Kid & Garza Jr. & The Decay. Jim Norton-Guy has some offense as the announcers try to sell a match no one wants, Crazzy Steve dominates Garza Jr. as we hear more stupidity from our announce team. Almost didn't notice Garza Jr. playing Ricky Morton as bigger Reno Scum guy takes things away from being Abyss' battle. The annoyance ends as both Reno Scum wins, and Andrew Everett talks about wanting to wrestle TNA X-Division Champion Trevor Lee for the belt. He even decides to challenge Gregory Shane Helms to take part in a 4-way match.

Bruce is here to say who the fans say is the #1 Contender to the Impact World Heavyweight Championship. James Storm will drink not because he's in Impact, but to celebrate being #1 contender. Ethan Carter III is not happy he doesn't get the match. He seems to be turning with the way he says he built the promotion. Bruce tries telling EC3 he needs to go back to being the way he was. EC3 takes his advice, shakes his hand, and that's it.

The other Angle talks about Jeff Jarrett or something.

Braxton Sutter & Allie are here to battle Sienna & KM. Sutter battles with KM to start as we see Josh sadly returns. Sutter tries beating himn early as Josh talks about his team in tonight's main event while KM takes Sutter to the ground as again we ask the Presedent to bomb the table while Sutter tags in Allie, who starts to bring Sienna to a stumble, and pins her. We then see Kongo Kong, who beats up Sutter while Laurel Van Ness completes showing United the way overbooking is done.

Selling women's merchandise, boy they were nice.

Impact Knockout Champion Rosemary wrestles the returning Santana Garrett. The titleist shows the best can't plan with crazy. At least until a Frankensteiner by Garrett. But Rosemary takes things back her way until Garrett breaks the inverted STF. Garrett uses quick offense, and another Frankensteiner. But where the moonsault by Garrett doesn't get her target, it would be Rosemary's red wedding that ends the match.

Davey Richards has Angelina Love talk about last week. We don't think he has a memory of it.

Everett in a 4-way match with Marshe Rockett, Suicide, and Helms, who leave the ring to save himself. Lee is ejectet as Everett sends Rockett outside, where Suicide flies, but Helms gets a few hits before letting the other wrestlers get their hits in. No one stays at the top as the only times Helms enters the ring is when he has an advantage. His hubris though sees Everett hit him a few before Rockett uses the gourdbuster on Everett. Suicide incapacitetes him, and Everett throws him outside, then wins. After the match, Lee attacks, but Everett stands tall at the end.

Matt Morgan talks about whooping people.

Davey is in action against DJZ. At the start, Davey brawls with the 2-time X-Division Champion. He stops to make-out with his wife, which leads to DJZ bringing him back inside, but Davey uses the clothesline before trying the Coup De Grace, but DJZ avoids it, and even uses the neckbreaker. Though Davey wins with the ankle lock, but Eddie Edwards wants to fight as he and Elisha Edwards are spoiling for fighting.

We have veterans. And yes, we'll use different Presidents.

Team Borash: Morgan, GFW Heavyweight Champion Magnus, Alberto El Patron, and Chris Adonis. vs. Team Mathews: Impact World Heavyweight Champion Bobby Lashley, Bram, Eli Drake & Tyrus. 2 of the guys here are or were married to a WWE wrestler, and one will. Must truly mangle them inside. Alberto starts by dominating against Drake as he tags Adonis in. Drake makes space and Lashey tags, brings dominance. Adonis has Lashley stumbling, which sees him tag Bram in. Well this has Magnus tag in & beats up Bram. However, Bram recovers & tags Drake into the match. Magnus gets some offense in, but Drake is too much, so he tags in Alberto, who dominates going into break. Back from break, Drake and Adonis are brawling before Tyrus tags in. Tyrus suplexes Adonis and splashes him. Lashley tags in, and tries a pin before he uses his speed and power before tagging Bram back in. His offense is worth him being signed until the year 2084. Drake tags in, Lashley punches Adonis outside. Tyrus uses his power on Adonis until he hits the desperation maneuver, and tags in Morgan, who shows he still has it. This brings the everyone hits a finisher/signature before the boot by Morgan, and the pin by Magnus.

The wrestling is good, and the angles are not getting in the was as much,

Thursday, March 30, 2017

Impact Review 3/30/2017

Here we are again, Fighting to be the owl in the coalmine with this show.

Josh tries to testify before Karen interrupts wanting the rest of creative to find Sienna, then we see last week, when she hit the moron.

Karen is out here, she won't fire, but now wants to discuss Sienna bullying everyone. Great timing given what WWE has happening. Sienna tries intimidating Steph-Lite, but it doesn't work. The exchange goes like this several times before the cousin Sienna only told us about now, Kevin "KM" Matthews interrupts. Braxton Sutter runs to make the save to end the segment.

The remaining X-Division talks about making it great, then DJZ wrestles Andrew Everett. As each feel out, Everett goes outside, only for DJZ to fly after him. DJZ brings him back inside & crossbodies Everett as Josh reminds us why no one should follow him. DJZ has this until a springboard dropkick puts Everett in the lead before trying his moonsault. DJZ gets his feet up, then tries a ZDT, but is rolled-up to end the match. After the match, The Helms Dynasty berate him.

Up next is Impact Knockout Champion Rosemary to talk about her 5-month reign. She talks about dispatching everyone she's ever faced. This brings out ODB to drink and talk trash. We like her. Before Rosemary can leave, the division are out here. Everybody wants some before the brawl breaks out.

Don tries selling the shirt Reby improved.

Josh suses "Slap Nuts". Damn.

Now out here is Ethan Carter III. He thanks everyone, then aplogizes to Karen. He then says he needs to be the man he was before in order to defeat Impact World Heavyweight Champion Bobby Lashley. For some reason, James Storm, looking like The DCC better be dead. Storm respects EC3, but he says he built the place. Storm talks about the things he's done as why he deserves the shot. After asking everyone if they should wrestle, they agree to accept the outcome.

Lorado Kid & Garza Jr. talk about looking to win the Impact World Tag Team Championships. Followed then by Reno Scum. Both have a shot, Right? Maybe. But we don't remember.

But now Cody, GFW Not-X-Division-Champion battles Impact Grand-Champion Moose for the Grand gold in only the second bout tonight. Well this is a new low for 2017. Moose begins by using his power, until Cody uses a tornado DDT, though Moose breaks out a moonsault. The match heads outside, where Moose begins chopping away, until he his the post. He duck's the kick of Cody, which KO's a judge. Back inside, Cody uses a hagman's DDT as the 1st ends going into break. Don has LAX stuff, none with Hernandez. Back from break, Bruce is here to judge. The 1st goes to Moose. As the 2nd begins, Moose brawls before Cody hits the clothesline, which enables him to stomp away before using the knee on Moose's stomach. This soon has Moose try a pin, but the match heads back outside, where Moose goes for a weapon, but Brandi Rhodes tries to stop him. This buys Cody to strike, then use the figure-four before the round ends. The 2nd belongs to Cody as Brandi leaves. The 3rd starts with a brawl before Moose bashes Cody with the clothesline, then Cody uses the disaster-kick. Then a yay/boo starts until they grapple and punch to the ground. Again brawling to end the 3rd. The fans take to believing in one more-round, but the win is Moose's.

We see the exact moment The Wolves explode before hearing about a last man standing bout next week.

Eli Drake talks about the new stars the promotion has, and that he brings it to a new level.

Karen hands Borash the note that next week will feature the battle royal to decide who will be wrestling Rosemary.

KM next vs. Braxton Sutter. KM throws Sutter until Sutter begins chopping away & 10-punching. Both wrestlers exchange momentum until the double-clothesline. Allie briefly heads in the ring to run away from a pursiung Sienna, this keeps going until it brings KM the opportunity to use a powerbomb into his own knees to end the match. After the match, all four brawl until Laurel Van Ness emerges looking like she four our 4-Loko.

LAX speaks in English ti devise their strategy.

Someone will try something on Sutter and Allie on the 14th.

The Decay vs. Reno Scum vs. LAX vs. Lorado Kid and Garza Jr. Still not sure who's who with most of these teams, but do our greatest. Both Reno Scum guys have Lorado Jr. isolated, but his agility helps him until LAX member Ortiz brawls. This leads to everyone brawling outside until Lorado Kid flies, after him, Garza Jr. does so going into break. Back from break, Lorado Jr. does well, but LAX uses some great double-teaming until Abyss tags in & dominates Lorado Kid. But when Crazzy Steve tags in, he forgets to be nowhere near Reno Scum, who take over until Lorado Kid tags in LAX, who taks out anyone entering. Even the women get involved, but this leads to LAX getting the win over Lorado Kid.

The wrestling gets interesting, the booking hinders.

Thursday, March 16, 2017

Impact Review 3:16 2017


Sadly do not have the review of last week’s mess, though we hope to have one more often as we see AndFuc ThatOwl try to go to war while trying to pay wrestlers. This will go awkwardly.

 

We see last week’s mess first though before Alberto El Patron walks out without the gold, uses his lady’s phrase, and talks about beating TNA/Impact World Heavyweight Champion Bobby Lashley. This brings Ethan Carter III to demand a match to see who goes after the gold. Alberto says EC3 is not Lashley. EC3 mocks Alberto, who insists he’s not wrestling, followed up with a brawl. This leads to Alberto accepting. Obviously one is turning, but whom is likely to anger many.

 

A One Night Only with guys who are not here, followed by Eddie Edwards talking about trying to help this place. If this place goes, we hope guys like him get a shot in WWE.

 

A worked-shoot-Lite about the deal with the TNA/Impact tag team issue.

 

The announce team is a mess as we see a video about Tyrus and Eli Drake. Then they team against Lerado Kid and Garza Jr. Drake starts with Lerado, both hold their own as Garza Jr. tags in, and sends Drake outside to get hit with a team assault. Lerado is in, but Tyrus tags in going into break. Back from break, Tyrus keeps Lerado separated as he tags Drake in and out of the match, but the hot tag presents the rally and ducking the hit, sending Tyrus to the ground, and winning using the school boy.

 

We see Edwards, James Storm, and TNA/Impact Grand-Champion Moose talking about NOAH. Strange we have a promotion working with us. We think they may be paid better.

 

Barging through, Cody talks about his name being pimped out as he holds Jeff Jarrett’s failed promotion/Alleged gold scam’s midcard belt. He does a worked-shoot while bribing Brandi Rhodes’ opponent on the small price she’s being paid. Maybe if Jarrett paid her in time shares. Back from break, TNA/Impact Knockout Champion Rosemary attacks.

 

EC3 talks about defeating everyone is what makes this place great. Strangely, his match is next. Both begin by brawling into break. Back from break, EC3 beams right in the stomach. As EC3 stomps away and throws Alberto around, he pins as Lashley talk booms up. Both wrestlers head outside as we think about pushing Josh Mathews do… We promised a friend we would not say that. Back in the ring, EC3 gets out of a wristlock and uses his moves of doom, and sends Alberto to both the outside, then the table. Once back inside, EC3 is sent outside this time going into break. We like seeing Don on TV. Back from break, EC3 blasts away before being hit with Alberto’s own moves of doom. Alberto goes for an armbreaker, but EC3 rolls out of it. Alberto goes to fly, but EC3 brings him into the turnbuckle. After brawling, EC3 gets out of the stomp attempt, and hits the TK3 before cornering himself to heal.  He hits a second TK3, but heads outside to catch his breath & the chair. He wants to strike, until he throws the weapon. Alberto hits the kick, then locks in the armbreaker, getting the win. After the bout, respect is paid from Alberto to EC3, who shakes his hand. Makes the bout’s outcome tolerable.

 

Reno Scum yell about becoming TNA/Impact World Tag Team Champions.

 

EC3 is enraged, we suspect he’ll be wrestling in the cage.

 

Madison Rayne talks mainly being in TNA her adult life. A sad-life perhaps.

 

A fan with a sign believing in cutting Josh.

 

We found the Suicide gear and put it on some guy. He’s wrestling Andrew Everett, Braxton Sutter, and TNA/Impact X-Division Champion Trevor Lee. Everyone starts by eliminating Lee, then brawling with each other. When Suicide goes to fly, Lee stops him. Everett brawls with Lee, as both he & Suicide fly going into break. Back from break, Lee & Everett brawl while Gregory Shane Helms distracts as the announce team argues about “She” being here next week. That’s not very helpful. Lee throws Everett around before choking Suicide before being put in an abdominal stretch, and pin attempt. Sutter battles in, but then they all hit a tower of power. Laurel Van Ness looks drunk eating cake. She’s ours. The distraction attracts something, a win. Sienna emerges, and warns Sutter and Allie about their new love.

 

Moose talks about making the show great through his work.

 

Bruce heads out to say the Tag Team Belts will be decided in two weeks with four teams battling. The Decay are on their way. Abyss mumbles before Crazzy Steve adds not much before Rosemary says her team deserves them. Reno Scum emerge. Only time before Lerado and Garza JR., the second in different gear. All brawl until LAX destroy absolutely everyone.

 

Well tonight was something. Perhaps something needed.

 

Friday, February 24, 2017

WHATCULTURE WRESTLEMANIA FACTS ARCHIVES

For those who've been enjoying the lists of facts I'm writing for WhatCulture on each WrestleMania, I figured I'd archive them here for simple convenience.

Also enclosed are Adam Blampied's video versions of my lists, in which he adds his charming wit and whimsy to my entries. He does wonderful work, and he's put a larger spotlight on my writing, so yay Adam, gracias.

If you haven't done so already, follow Adam on Twitter, and what the hell, follow me too.

I (video version)
II (video version)
III (video version)
IV (video version)
V (video version)
VI (video version)
VII (video version)
VIII (video version)
IX (video version)
X (video version)
XI (video version)
XII (video version)
XIII (video version)
XIV (video version)
XV (video version)
2000 (video version)
X7 (video version)
X8 (video version)
XIX (video version)
XX (video version)
XXI (video version)
XXII (video version)
XXIII (video version)
XXIV (video version)
XXV (video version)
XXVI (video version)
XXVII (video version)
XXVIII (video version)
XXIX (video version)
XXX (video version)
XXXI (video version)
XXXII (video version)

Thursday, February 23, 2017

ImpactReview 2/23/2017

Thoughts this week to the families of George "The Animal" Steele, and to Ivan Koloff.
 
Fighting to be certain Josh says nothing. We’ll have to kill him last
 
Broken Matt Hardy speaks to George Washington, then departs part of his abilities to “Brother Nero” Jeff Hardy. Boy, the TNA World Tag Team Champions. Also, we see more about Braxton Sutter and Laurel Van Ness. We’ll drink more.
 
Cody briefly talks about TNA World Heavyweight Champion Bobby Lashley before bringing up Brandi teaming with Moose. After asking to see him, Moose enters. After being thanked by Cody, Moose says he has their backs. Cody begins to wonder about Brandi. After feigning it was a joke, he attacks Moose. After the assault, he hints at being Bullet Club. Still a better use than on RAW.
 
The recap of Cody’s assault of Moose sees him leaving with Brandi.
 
Eli Drake and Tyrus talk about the issues they have before locking-up, which happens after this promo. Before the bout, Drake berates his former guard. After trying to take Tyrus down, he then grabs another microphone and tries to get a fingerpoke, but Tyrus refuses, and pokes him back. After trying to get him to lay down again, it is decided by Drake to KO referee Earl Hebner. Tyrus goozles Drake until Drake offers more money. Tyrus brings Drake in for a hug.
 
Sienna is getting herself in her make-up for tonight, but Allie is not around. We think we know where.
 
Don West sells awesomely.
 
Matt’s back out of Egypt, wearing gold. He says they will need to get more gold.
 
Jade talks taking back the division TNA Knockout Champion Rosemary dominates. This leads to the Champion saying Jade should be saving herself instead. Jade demands a Last Woman Standing match, which is accepted.
 
Sutter and Mike Bennett drinking and talking about later. We almost joined them, but they may worry about our drinking.
 
Bram vs. Jesse Godderz starts next. Eddie Kingston tries to distract Jesse twice, but only succeeds after the third time. This leads to the match twice heading outside, but Bram can’t get the pin. Bram runs off the ropes, but is caught in a powerslam. Jesse locks in the Adonis lock as he drags Bram in the middle. Kingston tries to distract, but Bram is now slingshotted into him, and is pinned by Jesse. Afterwards, Jesse avoids the two DCC members out here.
 
The Hardys are in another lockerroom, where they asks to wrestle the Tag Team Champions of this promotion.
 
Allie’s here. She looks aggravated. Her voice seems normal. She then asks Sutter if he wants to do this. He seems ready to explode.
 
The Hardys wrestle what may be a shoot. Live in the Madison Civic Center, maybe the biggest bout. The Hardys battle Mathis-&-Rage. Again, mainly highlights of the match, with Jeff as a face in peril until he brings Matt into the match. Bringing them down with a double twist of fate and a side effect, the fight brings itself outside, before Jeff sends Rage down a staircase, and then helps Matt bring this to it’s end. The Hardys return to add these belts.
 
Josh Barnett talks about Lashley, then being sure to be clear he will win the belt.
 
Don sells brilliantly like Ziggler.
 
Josh Barnett aims to treat Bad Bones like he plans to treat Lashley. Barnett begins with kicks and a takedown. Before Barnett does any more, he is hit with a spear by Bad Bones, who dominates a bit, but is reversed into a powerbomb, then after a Northern Lights suplex, Barnett locks the keylock to get a win.
 
TNA X-Division Champion Trevor Lee defends against DJZ tonight. DJZ starts by lunging out at Lee and brawls with him on the outside of the ring. Once back inside, Lee kicks DJZ, but DJZ is able to get things his way, though he still has an injury bringing him down a bit. DJZ uses plenty of clotheslines, but is caught into a suplex, and punched by Lee, who targets the ankle of DJZ. Lee stays on him as Josh Mathews acts the second dumbest he has this week. DJZ uses a hurricarana, but the distraction of Gregory Shane Helms enables Lee to use the roll-up with tights to retain. After the match, DJZ attacks, but is almost Pillmanized until Andrew Everett makes the save.
 
Sutter is told he has to marry Laurel.
 
Next week has Lashley vs. Barnett. Ready up.
 
The wedding is now. Sutter brings the drunken Bennett. He should not have started drinking with us this morning. Rockstar Spud brings Aron Rex out. Bennett may want to start drinking some more to get through this. Laurel’s bridesmaids into break. Back from break, Laurel is introduces without the kayfabe dad who is financing this. But out is Allie. As fans begin chanting “We don’t care”, we prefer the wedding from Spaceballs. But while Laurel starts talking in a way Lee Ving know about, we get to the objections part, where Allie is stewing, but won’t say anything now. After being tripped, then berated, the rings are presented. Sutter proceeds to stutter before saying he won’t marry Laurel. He then says he’s in love with Allie. He then makes it official Allie’s job was at stake. Allie bellows out “I quit”, then Sutter bashes Bennett. Brooke runs out, then Robbie E.
 
A fun segment on an otherwise good, but plain show.

Thursday, February 16, 2017

Impact-Review 2/16/2017

Thoughts out to the loved ones of Chavo Guerrero Sr. And Nicole Bass.
 
Fight to be the best, or the Raw Deal awaits.
 
Before TNA World Tag Team Champions The Hardys defend, we see 2 recaps. One see Eddie Edwards betrayed. After this, The Decay battle Moose and Brandi Rhodes. The match begins with TNA Knockout Champion Rosemary distracts Moose, but it doesn’t help until they get Moose outside. This brings Crazzy Steve dominating with holds & chops, but Moose brings himself back up until Abyss begins to distract him. Despite this, Moose sends Steve outside, and tags in Brandi, who dominates Rosemary off the top. She brings Moose back in, who gets the pin over Steve.
 
Edwards does not stop to say barely anything, but Davey Richards is his target.
 
Moose tells Brandi she’s being Mini-Moose. A) That name is familiar. B) He may want to get with her.
 
Edwards says that what happened was his biggest low-point. Angelina Love says Davey is not fighting, and asks where Eddie was when Davey was injured. She then introduces Davey. The two former partners argue & Davey says he will destroy the name they built before they brawl. When it’s over, Edwards demands a street fight to be held tonight.
 
Last night, Braxton Sutter was at the bachelor party held by Mike Bennett. The guys there look about what you’d expect of us.
 
The Hardys are in the arena out in Mexico. Boy, the referee will go underground.
 
Next week Sutter marries Laurel Van Ness. But Allie’s stuff last night doesn’t appease many.
 
Eddie Kingston wrestles Jesse Godderz. Jesse is dominated early on with strikes, but Jesse brings his surprising speed to battle out. It doesn’t last long, as he is suplexed, and is sent into the middle-rope. Jesse takes advantage of a miss to break out, using the blockbuster to try to pin. When Kingston goes outside, he is grabbed, but hangs Jesse on the rope, and hits an STO to try a pin of his own. Jesse battles out and tries an Adonis Lock. After a few more moves, Jesse gets the pin, but has to run after the arena blacks out.
 
Sutter doesn’t want what’s implied to be drugs, and wants to leave, but Bennett refuses to let him leave. One of Bennett’s buddies climbs a ladder, brings himself on the possible drug guy. Well, it’s not the 1st time we had guys wrestle wasted.
 
Tyrus will host Fact of Life this week. Guessing Greg Gutfeld won’t join him.
 
Allie’s party pisses them off. Should’ve had drinking.
 
Tyrus introduces Eli Drake, who despite having an arm in a sling, demands Tyrus get off the table. Drake  becoming like The Rock with his mockery of Tyrus’ weight, and ends up with Tyrus hand on his throat. Both will wrestle next week.
 
The Hardys meet Konnan, who’s happy to know they’re used to not wanting money.
 
Laurel gets some freaky looking present. It’s from us.
 
The Hardys battle Psicosis and Super-Crazy to be Tag Team Champions in Mexico too. Basically, it’s in clips as Vanguard 1 interacts with some femininas. Fun action as we see the win of The Hardy’s. Now, they’ve teleported to their home. Next week sees them battle in Mid-Atlantic action.
 
Brooke wants Sienna next. She may be drunk with us though after what we think will happen.
 
Brooke vs. Sienna starts with the speed of Brooke and the power of Sienna keeping it even-handed, with each one exchanging moves like a game. Once Sienna uses Brooke’s arm to apply a sleeper-like attack. Sienna then uses her tape to resume the choke, then stomps away. Brooke still kicks out as we get the indication Sienna possibly becoming her own entity will happen. Brooke rolls out of the way, leading to Sienna having to stop before plowing into Maria. As Brooke gets out of the AK-47, she uses the roll-up to win. Seems like it was on RAW.
 
Sutter wants to leave while it’s Bennett’s friend bringing an altered DVD of Bad Teacher, then Bennett’s idea of the stripper is the bust. Didn’t think there would end up a time where that DVD would work nicely. Still better than the recent party we went to.
 
Don West is selling more great stuff. Or stuff is being sold by great Don.
 
Drake promises to beat Tyrus next week as he intrudes on the cameraman’s personal space.
TNA World Heavyweight Champion Bobby Lashley is out here. As Lashley takes being TNA Champion with arrogance, he says he loves fighting, battling, & hurting people. This brings out Josh Barnett, who everyone suspects will soon be TNA Champion. We’re not joking. Barnett doubts Lashley’s drive to be TNA Champion. Lashley warns him not to do this as he shakes hands. Lashley says in MMA, there are going to be rules to protect Barnett, but Barnett tries to lock the arm of Lashley. This results in both deciding to wrestle.
 
Sutter leaves after everyone’s plastered, but not before placing Bennett’s phone next to him after sending out a phone-call on it. Even the happily married & faithful need to put a passcode on.
 
Edwards is here for the bout. This leads to Angelina speaking to distract, leading to Davey attacking from behind. Davey tries to throw Edwards into the rail, but he’s reversed & chopped. Edwards goes to again, but Davey gets out of the way. Davey attacks the arm that was sent into the ring-post going intobreak. Back from break, Davey hit’s Eddie’s hand with the chair. Davey then stomps on Eddie in the corner. Davey’s stopping to taunt brings the opening to Eddie, who sends Davey outside & flies at him. Edwards throws him back inside and brings the chair back in, but this brings the chair of Angelina to again distract. Now Davey strikes. Davey goes again, but Elisha Edwards makes the save, but is beaten up as Angelina handcuffs her to the bottom rope. As Angelina goes to use the weapon, Edwards throws himself over his wife as a shield. Davey then grabs it and slugs away. Angelina puts the second weapon on Edwards, which Davey uses to con-chair-to. Then she low-blows referee Earl Hebner. The match is officially a no-contest, though Angelina begins to count as a symbol.
 
Next week’s match with the Hardys is advertised. A bit much after that. Oh well.
 
Not a bad week, though it is again slower than Nick Patrick’s 3-count.