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Wednesday, October 7, 2015

Impact Review 10/7/2015

Boy Bound For Glory was a great event. We now know that TNA World Heavyweight Champion Matt Hardy will have a good, long reign. PSYCH! We seem to be under the impression we had no more time on the network, but they have given us until January. So what better idea than to use an unrelated series of matches that have been retconned into being about our top prize. Enough talking, let’s roll this.

A recap of a now meaningless new reign brings the commentators to talk about not having a Champion. We see how Ethan Carter III went to his attorney James M. McGill Esq. Next Matt talks about how he has no choice but to vacate the Championship. You know, this real life mess would’ve been avoided had we put it on Drew Galloway. But that would be too logical. We’re not done yet, as Dixie and Billy accept the vacation of the Championship less people now care about. We now have a series of matches to decide the new Champion, AND it will be inter-gender. Andy Kaufman has been appeased by possibly Russo, but we hope. There is a round robin grouping, and a system of points. The roster is also separated into groups. This week’s four groups are: Group U.K. Which has Drew, Orange is the New Bram (Who may get this into LOLTNA for some reason), Rockstar Spud, and Grado. Group Wildcard, which has Crazzy Steve, Mahabali Shera, Aiden O’Shae, and Kenny King. Group KO has TNA Knockout Champion Gail Kim, Awesome Kong, Brooke, and Madison Rayne. And Group Champions, which has Mr. Anderson, EC3, Austin Aries, and Bobby Lashley. We then get the look at the different groups.

Drew talks about how Matt is handling this the right way. He then says he is going to get through the group he’s in.

Drew vs. Bram starts this show. After they stare each other down, they lock-up. Bram is forces to break, but punches Drew. Drew grabs him by the beard, and throws Bram outside. They brawl around the rail before Drew sends Bram into the ring. As they are brawling, we see them both talking about winning the match. They seem to be forgetting it’s about the Championship. Back out of it, and Bram is punching Drew outside. He then sends Drew into the steps before sending him back into the ring. Bram then punches away before locking in a chinlock. Bram breaks the hold, causing Drew to try to strike him, but Bram sends him back down into another rest hold. Drew battles out into a yay boo. Drew then strikes away on Bram and powerslams him. The match again goes outside, where Drew chops Bram. Drew then smashes Bram on the steps and apron before sending him back into the ring. Drew then pins Bram to win 3 points.

Gail is asked about the series, she says she has the chance to be Heavyweight Champion. We suspect a certain swerver is back.

Drew talks about how Bram’s aggression made the match a war. Well Bram’s aggression is well documented.

Gail vs. Brooke is next. Gail starts with a headlock before tossing Brooke down. Brooke reverses before we get another discussion about the series, but not what it’s for. Back out of it, Brooke punches Gail before Gail briefly battles out. We get a seesaw pin sequence, and a hurricarana by Brooke. Brooke is then sent into the corner, but reverses Gail’s Irish whip into a drop toehold into an inverted STF. We thought Mrs. Cena was on RAW. Brooke breaks her hold to try something else, but Gail fights out and uses a stretch muffler-like hold. When Gail breaks, she attempts eat defeat. Brooke counters and sends both of them to the mat. Another yay boo leads to a series of Brooke clotheslines before hitting a second rope facebuster. She then goes to fly, but Gail rolls out of the way. Gail then uses a figure-four on the ringpost. Gail heads in the ring to hit eat defeat again, but a series of reversals leads to Brooke winning with a small package to get 3.

EC3 talks about how he deserves to still be Champion. And despite being screwed, he will still defeat Aries, and be winning the series.

A recap of Gail winning leads to the points.

Spud vs. Grado barely starts before they talk about fighting. Grado uses a senton before getting ready to cannonball. Spud rolls out of the way, then attacks Grado in the corner. Spud sends Grado off the ropes, but Grado reverses with a pedigree. Spud responds with a Stinger Splash. Boy this better not be overbooked. Attitude Era moves resume when Spud uses a worm. Then a People’s elbow by Grado. Velvet Sky has the ownership on s---y versions of other wrestlers moves. Grado’s Styles Clash is blocked before the UnderSupder uses a chokeslam. Spud attempts an F5 before Grado attempts sweet chin music countered into a stunner, then an underdog to get 3.

Geico’s Europe ad is sadly fitting.

Tyrus says he supports EC3, explaining why he’s out there, and will see how this goes.

EC3 vs. Aries (With Thea Trinidad) Another explanation is needed given Aries is supposed to be gone. After a feeling out period, EC3 starts using power. They cut away to talk about nothing in particular. Back out, and Aries is inside, with EC3 getting a breather. Once back inside, EC3 briefly takes over before Aries uses agility to send EC3 running. They brawl around outside before Aries sends him inside. Aries goes to fly, but has to take out Tyrus. When Aries goes to get back inside, EC3 knocks him off the go to break. Back from break, Aries gets out of a chinlock, but still needs to mount offense like it was Christy Hemme’s face after a bad introduction. He does after a series of punches that send EC3 outside. Aries does a suicide dive, then brings EC3 back in for a dropkick. EC3 uses a kick to battle out of the corner, but Aries keeps him on the ground. Aries is too distracted by Tyrus to do much, so EC3 hits a TKO for two. Before Aries can do anything, EC3 gets him up top for a superplex. Aries uses several strikes to send him down. Aries hits a 450, but only gets two. Aries attempts to go off the ropes, but Tyrus trips him, enabling EC3 to attempt several pins. When EC3 attempts to go off the ropes, Thea trips him. EC3 needs to get to the ropes to get out of last chancery. Aries and EC3 attempt their finishers several times before the match ends in a draw. Both men get 1 point. EC3 attempts a 1%er, but Aries reverses into a brainbuster.

Mr. Anderson talks about being in the best group, as he’s facing several former World Heavyweight Champions.

We then see an ad for Destination America’s next haunted show. They are not in the Asylum.

Aries is pissed.

Kong vs. Madison is next. Kong throws Madison around, and makes any offense by her nothing. Another discussion about nothing they’re fighting for. Madison attempts a sleeper, but Kong’s power is more effective. Kong uses a torture rack before trying a splash. Madison roll out of the way and battles ahead to dropkick to get two. Madison attempts a suplex, but Kong powers out and wins by implant buster to get 3.

Lashley hares Mr. Anderson’s feeling that both men are in the best division to be in. Lashley also promises to defeat Mr. Anderson as our 2006 SmackDown resumes.

Matt tells Jeremy Borash he had a great ending, but had to give it up. We hear that he is in one of next week’s four groups.

Interesting no wildcards tonight. Guess one of them cut the brakes.

Mr. Anderson vs. Lashley main events. After a random shot of Lashley beating Eric Young last year to become Champion for reign #1, We see Lashley use a series of grapples to feel Mr. Anderson out before break. Back from break, and Lashley brings Mr. Anderson to Suplex Township before again, generic talk about nothing. Mr. Anderson rolls out of the way of a spear, sending Lashley into the post. Mr. Anderson works on the left arm before going for a dropkick for two. Back on the arm, Mr. Anderson ends up armdragged. Mr. Anderson regroups enough to go off the top. Mr. Anderson resumes his assault on the arm. Lashley uses what power he has left to make use of several big moves, including a spinebuster. Lashley again goes for a spear, but Mr. Anderson avoids it and uses several moves. Mr. Anderson hits a rolling senton drop twice before using a Samoan drop. Mr. Anderson tries for a mic check, but for a second time this week, nothing. Moments to bring this home, and Lashley hits a spear to get the three, 3, and end the show almost right away. Final scores this week: Drew, Brooke, Spud, Kong, and Lashley 3. EC3 and Aries 1.

This week’s broadcast highlights TNA’s run in a nutshell. Great wrestlers having great matches that mean almost nothing because management has been a sputtering mess. Whether or not Russo was actually involved in this series, it seems like something he would do in thinking it’s innovative. The one defense though, is that after good, but standard TV, this brings a new pace, and even direction. Albeit one that may still end up the last mess in TNA history. We shall see how this whole mess pans out, and if this gives problems in regards to a new network. Until then, have a good week.

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